Abu Huraira (ra) reported: It was said to the Messenger of Allah, (saw), “Which wives are best?”
The Prophet said, “One who pleases him when he looks at her, obeys him when he requests her, and does not dispute him in herself and her wealth in a way he dislikes.” (al-Nasa’i 3231)
Husbands expect different things in a marriage compared to a Wife, to a Husband his greatest expectations are obedience, respect and loyalty,
Obedience first to the shariah of Allah(swt), then obedience to the husband in his rights given by Allah(swt), disobedience to any of the above will result in the righteous husband loosing heart, there is nothing more beautiful than piety nothing more ugly than ingratitude
It was narrated that ‘Abd-Allah ibn ‘Abbas (ra) said: The Messenger of Allah (saw) said:
“I was shown Hell and I have never seen anything more terrifying than it. And I saw that the majority of its people are women.” They said, “Why, O Messenger of Allah?” He said, “Because of their ingratitude (kufr).” It was said, “Are they ungrateful to Allah?” He said, “They are ungrateful to their companions (husbands) and ungrateful for good treatment. If you are kind to one of them for a lifetime then she sees one (undesirable) thing in you, she will say, ‘I have never had anything good from you.’ (al-Bukhari, 1052).
Respect is dealing with the husband in a honourable way, every man wants to be the king of his home and treated like one, if this is not the case, then don’t expect to be treated like a Queen
Respect his decisions, support him, appreciate him, speak to him in a respectful way, be soft, treat him better than others in your life this will earn you his favour and respect too
Disrespect, harsh words, distaste, dissatisfaction and constant nagging will result in friction and ultimately divorce,
“For a woman who’s tongue is long with her husband, her days with him are very short” (Ibn Taymiyyah).
Loyalty is a given, loyalty to him, his secrets, his wealth, his highs and lows but most importantly your beauty and chastity,
We live in a society that is infatuated with how we look in public, today everything is on display, yet in Islam it is the opposite, your private life is far more important and that is the only place for adornment and beautification,
Your beauty is for your husband so beautify yourself for him alone,
Some woman today argue that they only wear make up outside the home because of low self-esteem or because they want to feel good,
Yet the majority of those who use this haram excuse seem only to do so in public while at home they do not, so who are they really trying to impress the world or husbands?
No real man wants the world looking or touching one of the most precious things in his life, so my sister why lower yourself to something less than precious.
Chastity is guarded by hayah (modesty), once that is broken and cracks start to begin this is a perfect time for Shaytaan to plant his seeds of haraam ideas and evil inspirations,
All the above and the encouragement to do them can be summed up in one Hadith,
Abu Huraira(ra) reported: The Messenger of Allah, (saw), said,
“If a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity, and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes.” (Ibn Hibban 4252)
So my sisters it is now up to you to do whatever you wish with the above information, no expensive marriage counselling needed